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Me and Grief taking a walk

So today is a good day.





After last blog post, I was so fortunate to receive an outpouring of love from so many amazing friends.  So much.  I have such a thankful heart for youall.  It was so helpful to be able to talk about how I feel and to cry every now and then.  Maybe there's hope for me yet.  :)

But here's the thing -- every time I re-read my blog post (which I do, several times, kind of to look for errors but also to enjoy it), I cry when I get to the part about what I do have (grief, memories,etc.). It's just like this is an open wound and if I poke at it, it bleeds.  I guess it's still so fresh and I'm still living in my new normal, so it's still prone to bleed.

A few days later...
So I have learned a lesson.  The tightrope that I walk between crying and not crying does not need any further help, like trying to develop a crush I've had for almost a year.  It didn't end like I had hoped it would.  That's all I have to say about that.

So now I a…

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