Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Laundry Physics

Every now and then I have an idea that makes me think, hmm, I oughta write a blog post about that.  And then I write it down in the Notes on my Iphone and look at it again in a few months.  But I feel so strongly about the following words that I am compelled to write this blog post NOW.
There is a separate set of physics that govern laundry.  Now, I know that students of physics, two of which exist in my house as teenagers, will say that an object in motion stays in motion (as evidenced by the activity of my 71-year old mother) and that an object at rest stays at rest (as evidenced by the activity, or lack thereof, of my 74-year old father).  And I know that there’s something about molecules that keeps my Diet coke from running over the sides of my glass if I over-pour just a little too much.

Hey guys - this is a cami.
But one thing that I know for sure is that laundry has its own set of physics.  The only reason I know that this exists is that somehow, someway, the tiniest cami strap wraps itself not only around the center turny-thing (that’s for you laymen) but around every button and piece of clothing that has twisted itself into a mess during the course of being washed.  Back in the times of what some call Ancient Macedonia, Midas tied this crazy knot that nobody could undo and somebody started calling it a Gordian knot (I’m thinking that “the really hard knot to undo” was a close second.)  This cami, also like some threads that come loose, was a total and complete Gordian knot.   Needless to say, I was working at high frustration levels to get this undone and get this laundry into the dryer, where I desperately hoped it would not repeat its crazy physics rule.
I think I recognize one of my socks!
But I also offer the worldwide and yet to be solved problem:  What happens to the other sock in the dryer?  I can only assume that something like a law of physics can come up with an answer.  Also to be considered:  How can a red item you’ve washed several times ALL OF A SUDDEN decide to release its dye?  Was it monitoring your thoughts and knew exactly when you would trust it not to make everything pink?  This sounds much bigger than something that can be explained with mere science.  So don’t say you haven’t been warned.  And if the Nobel people are looking for a truly deserving recipient, they should be looking for the guy that finds the other socks.