Wednesday, May 25, 2016

RealToLife Week Three - Driving the Struggle Bus

Okay, if you are here to see how great I am doing with my weightloss effort, you may as well drop that expectation like pronto.  This week has been a week-long pass on the struggle bus.  But I have learned some valuable things.

1.  Some habits are better than no habits.
Up until, oh, two weeks ago, breakfast was a 32 oz. Diet coke/Coke and Little Debbie doughnuts from the Gate Store.  (yes, Herb Peyton, you can drop my endorsement check in the mail at your convenience.)  #Gate  This breakfast is roughly 400 calories of carbs and fat.  And a healthy dose of calcium-depleting soda.  Now, thanks to Beachbody, I am now consuming a delicious dose of a boatload of vitamins and lots of other stuff that is good for you.  And I'm doing it every day.  I think if I had to earn my way into Fitness Heaven, this is like 14 Hail Marys.  (Maries?  Help me out, English grammarians/Catholic people.) 

Another amazing thing I am doing is drinking the equivalent of a bathtub full of water every day. At least that is what I perceive it as.  All day long, just drinking and drinking and drinking.  I know that this is good for your skin and I have learned that your body needs water on a cellular level and when you feel thirsty, it's like the "check engine" light on your car.  You already are in crisis when you feel thirsty.  And something fun and cute is that I have an app through Beachbody where I get to check off my water consumption.  I like checking boxes. 

2.  Exercise kind of sucks and is kind of great.
I think that when I have been exercising every day, that it will be easier.  We have already discussed how having your fat in your gut makes it hard to do core exercises.  I just know that I will get better at these.  But on the other hand, exercise makes you feel amazing and like you could leap small buildings in a single bound.  And here's the funny thing -- when I get up at some gosh-awful time in the morning and exercise, then I almost forget I did it and want to keep on moving and exercising throughout the day!!!! It's crazy. 

But the getting started part of exercising is hard.  But I do remember in the far reaches of my mind back to when I swam 1000m daily and ran.  And I liked it. 

So I will just keep plugging away.  I also got a really sweet motivational video from Coach Lindsey on the value of showing up.  So even when you have been riding the struggle bus and feel like a total failure, keep showing up. 

3.  Your body is not waiting on you to decide to make healthy choices.
This week my mom found out that she has congestive heart failure. 
Now, my dad had that too, but we also called my dad Captain Mayonnaise.  That man would slather on the mayo like nobody's business.  And on lots of things. 
But my mom is the exercising and eating right queen!  When her doctor first told her she has congestive heart failure, she ( and I ) were both like, how do you have congestive heart failure?  So apparently every day and every meal counts towards your health. 

So.... faced with this knowledge, I wanted to go eat a box of Twinkies.  Seriously.
But knowing how I have eaten in my life (lots of fast food) and how I do not have a regular history of exercise (does walking to the refrigerator count?)  I am turning over a lot of new leaves.  I saw a meme with a beautiful curvy chick on it and it said something like "your body keeps an accurate food journal, regardless of what you write down."  Dang.  So since my body is not waiting on me to make healthy choices, and is getting worse or better with every day's choices, I have two choices:  get fit, or stay fat. 

I choose get fit. 

So you get to read this RealToLife blog one more time next week and then this month-long project will end.  I don't know about you guys, but online dating was a lot more fun and less heavy.  Writing about health and good choices is not very funny. THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Next RealToLife.... Your help needed!

This month is super fun, don't get me wrong.... but next month is coming up soon and I need your help.

In the month of June, I will be attempting the most challenging of Pinterest projects.  I think I am pretty crafty, and have 22 Pinterest boards.  But I need your submission of a craft project or recipe that could be a huge success or a Pinterest-y fail out the wazoo. 

So... would you please leave me a link to a project that you think is Pants-worthy?  Leave it here or on my facebook.  Next week, you, the readers, will vote on what projects make it into Thunderdome.

Thanks so much!!! You all make this so much fun and I couldn't do it without you!

By the way.... still no online dating love.  It seems like I am getting number of responses from men of color ... is interracial dating a thing?  Or is it too stigmatic in the South?  Let me know.


Tuesday, May 17, 2016

RealToLife Week 2: A Vacation Foodnado Wrecks Havoc

So yeah. 
I would love to say that this week so far has been a win-win, but it's more like a when-when. When I plan to eat when I'm supposed to, it works out. When I exercise, it's great. But when life takes over, it's more like, when do you think you are going to lose weight doing this?

So when I last left you, gentle reader, I was riding high on a wave of euphoria, thrilled that I was able to rise with the sun to exercise.  I was feeling great and wanting to leap tall buildings in a single bound.  And then, Wednesday.

Coach Lindsey says it's toxins leaving the body, but they made a pit stop in my head and took up painful residence.  Like, I just want to take meds and a nap, in that order.  So no exercising Wednesday night.

Thursday we left to go to Panama City, avoiding the hordes of people descending upon our village like invading Norsemen, also known as the TPC, except they came in Mercedes and Tahoes.  It's a see and be seen; think Dick's Sporting Goods meets Ladies' Night, with some men wearing exceedingly questionable plaid pants and some women dressing to impress.  Although golf is a sport loved by many, the love is lost on this girl.  So instead of watching golf, we went to the beach.

As is fairly typical of our family, it took about two hours longer to leave than we anticipated, because of last minute things that must be done, less the world stop rotating on its axis --plant watering and such.  Without going into too much detail here, I pretty much threw my dieting caution to the wind as we passed the city limit sign.  Sigh.

We stayed with a family friend that is pretty much the hostess with the mostess.  What's a girl to do when faced with a delicious lemon cake?  Or world-famous party chicken?  Sure, our hostess did make several concessions to my diet efforts, but it was like a minefield of yummy food.  On one trip to the beach, we did stop at Sonic, Home of Diet Foods,  and I did order a grilled chicken wrap instead of a corn dog and cheesy tots.  I felt pride over my "not this, but that" choice.

For the win:  I did take a 2-mile walk Thursday night and a fairly rigorous walk on soft sand on the beach Friday.  And young son made me run part of the way on the beach.  He is beast mode.  He ran the whole way back, which was no short distance.  After about 100 feet, I was beat.  I walked the rest of the way back.

Also for the win:  I note that I actually want to drink water.  When faced with the opportunity to get a Diet Coke, as would be my modus operandi, I chose to get a giant bottle of water.  And I liked it.

I did take my 21 Day Fix and my Cize DVDs to do at my host's home, but the only DVD was in the main TV watching area and I felt not a little, but a lot self-conscious about doing them in front of even these very close friends.  I mean, there's nothing like sweating and grunting your way through an exercise DVD in the privacy of your own home.  Somehow, that "joy" does not translate to sweating and grunting on display for close friends and family.  The feeling was more like abject humiliation, kind of like saying, hey, come watch this fat girl sweat!  So thus the walking I mentioned earlier.

So, as my first full week draws to a close, I see where I need to improve:  Eat better, exercise more.  I have to tell you that it does feel self-defeating to eat the wrong things, because I know that my body keeps an accurate food journal and does not cheat on portion sizes or "forget" to write things down.  So far I have yet to lose any weight, but I feel like I have more energy and I am getting better at the routine of exercising.  So this next week, while I'm NOT on vacation, I am going to super focus on eating just the right things and in the right amounts.  Jesus take the wheel.

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Flying Pants RealToLife: Week 1 with my Beachbody coach

Monday, May 9th, 2016.  This is the first day of the rest of my life.

That phrase has always perplexed me a little.  Yes, every day is really the first day of the rest of your life.  But I guess picking out one day to start something that you hope will change your life deserves a declaration.

In summary:

  • I work with an amazing Beachbody coach, Lindsey Owens, because I realized I can't do it on my own and need help.
  • I have a flexible food plan and an exercise plan.
  • This blog is not paid or sponsored by Beachbody.  

Monday began like many days do.... but let me back up.  Due to Mother's Day festivities, both my Saturday and Sunday were taken up with fun and frivolity, but kept me from doing my meal planning for this week.  I was able to catch up Sunday night, but by the time I got home from Publix at almost 10 pm I was not a fan of prepping food for the week.  So I didn't, because...

...I thought, wow, I am super excited, so there's NO way I will oversleep.  So of course I woke up early and thought, hmm... I can go back to sleep for 20 minutes.  Well, you know that feeling of panic when you wake up and there is just too much light coming through the curtains to be early?  Yes, it is WAY too late to shower.  So I showered anyway and came up with a plan of attack for my food consumption.

In my inimitable non-Martha Stewart way, I tossed all the food I would eat for the next few days at work in a plastic bag.  I know, CLASSY. But with no time to make little individual portions, I threw it all in a bag and knew I could just make my lunch in the employee lounge at my work.

I did well for breakfast; I had what is called Shakeology, which is like magical unicorn goodness in a chocolate smoothie.  There's lots of good things in there.  Later, I ate hummus and carrots for a morning snack, except I just about choked on these dry carrots I had brought.  No bueno. Lunch was a combo of avocado (yum), turkey, tomato, and lettuce on a whole wheat tortilla.  Yum.  I ate some yogurt in the afternoon.  I thought I was doing well.

About 4:00, I was dying.  It's like my junk food ventilator had been yanked out and I was gasping for air.  So, to be completely transparent and honest, I stopped at Sam's on the way home and ate a slice of three-meat pizza.

I know.  I know.  I know.

I felt like I had sludge running through my veins.  But I think as soon as the simple, white, beautiful carbs had their chance to work their magic, I felt invigorated.  So much so that I whipped out my Mother's Day beach bike and rode it down to the beach, which round trip was about two miles.  And then I did my workout video for the day, an upper body concentration that did not kill me.  It was doable, basically because I didn't use heavy weights.  I have no upper body strength, so I'm trying to work into this.

Phew!  So that was day 1.  LOL.

The next morning I had planned on my exercise calendar to get up and exercise in the morning.  There are some family members (who will remain nameless) who doubted my ability to get up on time, much less get up early and exercise.  To you  I say SO THERE, AND WHATTTTTT.  I was up at 5:45 and got it done!  This day I used a dvd called Cize, which is basically learning dance steps and at the end of the 30 minutes, you actually dance these cool steps to an actual popular song.  With the  dance background I have, this appeals to me a lotta lotta.  Of course, I was a big sweaty mess with a side of bedhead, but who cares because it's just me.

Abs update:  Day 1 and 2.  Certain death.  If you know me, I carry a glorious amount of fat right in my gut.  As a side note, I have always wanted to be one of those people who carries weight in her butt.  But anyway, all that extra guttage makes "core" exercises challenging at best.  I've about decided that the term core, which didn't really show up on the scene until the 90's, is really code word shortened from hard core, as in you have to be crazy to be able to do all of these!  I am assuming that if I keep doing them, I will get better at them and they will be easier.  We shall see.

Eating on Day 2 went much better and no pizza had to be sacrificed at the altar of poor choices.  I eat 5 times a day, which appeals to me.  But it's healthy things I like -- oranges, yogurt, and Shakeology, to name a few.  I did see my container of hummus in the refrigerator and secretly wished I had a bag of chips to eat with said hummus.

More exercise:  I think the endorphins are kicking in, because I am feeling great!  I even walked at lunch with my amazing friend who is sweet and wonderful but also kicks my butt when I need it.  She gives the best advice.

Oh, I also need to mention my accountability.  Besides all you good folks and my coach Lindsey and my entire facebook group, I also have entered a thing at a website called Diet Bet.  You put down a specified amount (in my case, $20) and you have about a month to lose 4% of your body weight.  If you do, you split the pool of money with everyone else that lost their 4%.  If you don't, you lose your money!  I would much rather get money than lose money.

Wow.  I am super overwhelmed with all these new changes and choices, but as Coach Lindsey says, I take it a day at a time.

Today we laid groundwork and i explained everything I think you will need to know from this point on.  if you have another question, please feel free to comment below or email me @  Next time, all gloves are off.

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

So about that.....

For the last six weeks, I have enjoyed writing and publishing the online dating blog series. 

I have planned to start a new series on me cooking, which are two words that are pretty funny together.  It kind of makes me chuckle just to type that.  And I started to do a video of me and my adventure with spaghetti squash.  It was a terrible video.  Like, my Facebook friends would unfriend me bad.  So I have another idea. 

Okay, not that idea.
I am starting a May Challenge Group with my amazing friend Lindsey Owens.  She is going to help coach me to wellness success.  I am going to diary my path to weight loss/wellness.  Part of me thinks I'm crazy to put this out there for everyone to see, and part of me knows that this kind of accountability may be just what I need!  My friends at Gallup polls say that 51% of adult Americans want to lose weight.  I know that the online dating thing was an encouragement to some, so I'm hoping that this month of diary blogs will do the same!

So in preparation for a month of wellness success, please take a look at a previous blog post, 4 Places You Won't Find Fat People.

Thanks and have a super great day!  Next Wednesday, I look forward to sharing my week with you in the same style in which we walked through online dating together.